1
00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:11,172
Can you read me?
[romantic music plays]

2
00:00:11,275 --> 00:00:12,724
What do I need?

3
00:00:16,103 --> 00:00:17,275
You okay?

4
00:00:17,379 --> 00:00:19,034
I have a boyfriend.

5
00:00:19,793 --> 00:00:22,827
You've been having a fucking
affair this whole time?

6
00:00:22,828 --> 00:00:24,585
Come on, we hadn't
had sex in almost a year.

7
00:00:24,586 --> 00:00:26,137
Oh, it's all my fault.

8
00:00:26,138 --> 00:00:28,240
- I didn't say that.
- You literally just did.

9
00:00:28,241 --> 00:00:29,655
So it didn't go well, then?

10
00:00:29,656 --> 00:00:30,861
Well, I've got all my shit

11
00:00:30,862 --> 00:00:34,034
in the back of my car, so,
as well as expected.

12
00:00:34,035 --> 00:00:36,136
[David] I just want you to be
happy.

13
00:00:36,137 --> 00:00:37,862
[music intensifies]

14
00:00:37,965 --> 00:00:39,724
It's okay to feel lost.

15
00:00:40,137 --> 00:00:44,172
Sometimes it clears the path
for new things to happen.

16
00:00:44,275 --> 00:00:45,827
[music stops]

17
00:00:46,827 --> 00:00:48,896
[slow piano music plays]

18
00:01:20,689 --> 00:01:22,344
So...

19
00:01:22,448 --> 00:01:24,000
This is the date.

20
00:01:24,103 --> 00:01:25,655
I love that.

21
00:01:28,655 --> 00:01:30,241
Do we have a game plan?

22
00:01:30,344 --> 00:01:34,206
Listen, I've got a list,
but I am prone to impulse.

23
00:01:34,310 --> 00:01:37,310
We could end up with a
lot of spontaneous purchases.

24
00:01:37,311 --> 00:01:38,481
Do you need me to rein you in?

25
00:01:38,482 --> 00:01:40,033
Just so I know the ground rules
here.

26
00:01:40,034 --> 00:01:41,517
I mean, you can try.

27
00:01:41,518 --> 00:01:43,171
You'll never convince me
in the moment, though.

28
00:01:43,172 --> 00:01:45,413
Everything is an amazing idea.

29
00:01:47,241 --> 00:01:49,724
Ah, no thanks.

30
00:01:49,827 --> 00:01:51,275
[text alert]

31
00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:57,310
[pop] Mike says "Fucking
great..."

32
00:01:58,137 --> 00:02:01,241
[typing on phone]
[text sent]

33
00:02:01,724 --> 00:02:03,482
Do you have reception?

34
00:02:05,965 --> 00:02:09,034
- Just gone to no bars.
- Oh, man.

35
00:02:09,137 --> 00:02:11,034
Do you think they do this on
purpose?

36
00:02:11,035 --> 00:02:14,792
What, create huge shells of
metal and concrete to block reception,

37
00:02:14,793 --> 00:02:16,654
so you can't look at your phone
and compare prices?

38
00:02:16,655 --> 00:02:18,965
- [small laugh]
- Probably.

39
00:02:19,068 --> 00:02:20,241
They do have free Wi-Fi.

40
00:02:20,344 --> 00:02:22,103
Ew. I don't use public Wi-Fi.

41
00:02:22,206 --> 00:02:24,034
You don't use public Wi-Fi, do
you?

42
00:02:24,035 --> 00:02:25,033
It's free.

43
00:02:25,034 --> 00:02:27,965
Public Wi-Fi is like public
toilets.

44
00:02:28,068 --> 00:02:29,758
You stay out.

45
00:02:31,482 --> 00:02:33,827
Oh, you don't use public
toilets too, do you?

46
00:02:33,931 --> 00:02:36,448
Of course. But guys don't
have to sit down.

47
00:02:36,551 --> 00:02:39,931
- No surface contact.
- What a charmed life you lead.

48
00:02:40,793 --> 00:02:42,413
Ooh, cutlery.

49
00:02:42,517 --> 00:02:44,448
15 bucks.

50
00:02:45,413 --> 00:02:46,463
Done.

51
00:02:46,517 --> 00:02:47,586
[thud]

52
00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,482
[sigh]

53
00:02:52,724 --> 00:02:54,164
Do you think this couch is me?

54
00:02:54,241 --> 00:02:56,379
Could be. Might be.

55
00:02:56,482 --> 00:02:58,448
You never know until you try it.

56
00:03:00,517 --> 00:03:03,172
Think that pineapple
is staring at you.

57
00:03:03,275 --> 00:03:04,325
Yeah.

58
00:03:06,551 --> 00:03:09,620
- Do you owe him money or
something? -[laughs]

59
00:03:09,724 --> 00:03:12,034
Hey, don't stare.

60
00:03:12,137 --> 00:03:15,068
Uh, [laughs] I'm so sorry.
He's got ADHD.

61
00:03:15,172 --> 00:03:17,517
It's fine. I'm a big
fan of pineapple.

62
00:03:17,518 --> 00:03:18,861
It has a lot of health benefits.

63
00:03:18,862 --> 00:03:22,172
[laughs] They had a
back-to-school dress up day, but,

64
00:03:22,275 --> 00:03:24,517
um... it was supposed to
be job themed.

65
00:03:24,518 --> 00:03:26,412
Do you want to be a pineapple
when you grow up?

66
00:03:26,413 --> 00:03:28,931
No, the suit's from last
year's fruit day.

67
00:03:28,932 --> 00:03:30,585
Uh, he didn't want to be the
only kid

68
00:03:30,586 --> 00:03:33,596
not dressing up, but, um, he
doesn't know what he wants to be.

69
00:03:33,965 --> 00:03:35,758
It's okay. None of us do.

70
00:03:35,759 --> 00:03:37,792
There are worse things
to be than a pineapple.

71
00:03:37,793 --> 00:03:39,378
- [small laugh]
- I believe you could do it.

72
00:03:39,379 --> 00:03:40,586
[laughs]

73
00:03:41,379 --> 00:03:42,429
Say "bye".

74
00:03:43,620 --> 00:03:45,000
Bye. Thanks.

75
00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:48,000
Oh. [sighs]

76
00:03:48,931 --> 00:03:50,448
Can we stay here forever?

77
00:03:51,793 --> 00:03:52,931
No. [laughs]

78
00:03:53,034 --> 00:03:55,137
Come on. [sighs getting up]

79
00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:59,517
Everyone has ADHD these days.

80
00:03:59,620 --> 00:04:02,724
Is anyone still just a rude,
weird arsehole?

81
00:04:02,725 --> 00:04:04,861
Are you calling that little
pineapple an arsehole?

82
00:04:04,862 --> 00:04:07,068
No, he was cute enough.

83
00:04:07,172 --> 00:04:09,822
But let him be weird and awkward
and see what happens.

84
00:04:09,823 --> 00:04:11,550
He could turn out to be really
fun.

85
00:04:11,551 --> 00:04:13,827
These are very nice.

86
00:04:14,827 --> 00:04:17,137
18 pieces for 40 bucks.

87
00:04:17,241 --> 00:04:18,758
That is very good.

88
00:04:18,862 --> 00:04:21,241
- Should I get 2?
- For dinner parties?

89
00:04:21,242 --> 00:04:22,550
How many friends do you have?

90
00:04:22,551 --> 00:04:24,482
I don't have any friends.

91
00:04:24,586 --> 00:04:25,689
But I use all my dishes

92
00:04:25,793 --> 00:04:27,000
and I like clean things.

93
00:04:27,103 --> 00:04:29,344
I just don't like cleaning
things.

94
00:04:30,896 --> 00:04:32,827
That sounded pathetic.

95
00:04:32,931 --> 00:04:34,586
I'm not a loser, okay?

96
00:04:34,689 --> 00:04:36,206
I have friends...

97
00:04:36,310 --> 00:04:38,241
I think.

98
00:04:38,965 --> 00:04:41,206
How many friends do you have?

99
00:04:41,413 --> 00:04:43,206
Let me see. Uhh, none.

100
00:04:43,310 --> 00:04:45,034
I don't have any friends.

101
00:04:45,137 --> 00:04:46,275
Really?

102
00:04:46,276 --> 00:04:48,930
I mean, I used to have a drink
with people from school

103
00:04:48,931 --> 00:04:51,344
once a year and...
work friends like Helen.

104
00:04:51,345 --> 00:04:53,309
But now I don't really hang
out with anyone.

105
00:04:53,310 --> 00:04:55,103
Yeah, me neither.

106
00:04:55,689 --> 00:04:57,068
Are we losers?

107
00:04:57,069 --> 00:05:00,861
[laughs] I mean, I don't really
feel like a loser, do you?

108
00:05:00,862 --> 00:05:02,586
Yes. I do.

109
00:05:02,689 --> 00:05:04,241
How do we not have any friends?

110
00:05:04,344 --> 00:05:05,689
We're amazing people.

111
00:05:05,793 --> 00:05:08,310
- I would love to be friends with
us. -[chuckles]

112
00:05:09,344 --> 00:05:12,275
[happy music plays]

113
00:05:21,648 --> 00:05:24,688
This article says that
millennials

114
00:05:24,689 --> 00:05:27,481
have the least amount of friends
of all the generations.

115
00:05:27,482 --> 00:05:29,068
What did you search?

116
00:05:29,069 --> 00:05:30,861
'Why don't I have any friends?'

117
00:05:30,862 --> 00:05:32,310
Are you getting a signal?

118
00:05:32,413 --> 00:05:33,827
I'm on the Wi-Fi.

119
00:05:34,172 --> 00:05:35,965
[laughs]

120
00:05:36,068 --> 00:05:39,034
'27% of millennials
have no close friends.'

121
00:05:39,137 --> 00:05:40,931
'30% have no best friend.'

122
00:05:41,034 --> 00:05:43,448
'20% report having no friends at
all.

123
00:05:43,449 --> 00:05:45,585
We're like the worst segment of
that.

124
00:05:45,586 --> 00:05:49,862
'Overall, 30% of millennials
report feeling often or always lonely,

125
00:05:49,965 --> 00:05:52,896
significantly higher than
other generations.'

126
00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:54,310
Wow.

127
00:05:54,620 --> 00:05:56,448
Do you feel lonely?

128
00:05:58,241 --> 00:05:59,310
Yeah...

129
00:05:59,827 --> 00:06:01,275
I do...

130
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:04,413
Sometimes.

131
00:06:05,793 --> 00:06:07,758
Ooh, spatula.

132
00:06:07,862 --> 00:06:09,758
[Emily] Dollar fifty.

133
00:06:09,862 --> 00:06:12,551
Or I could get 2 for 6 dollars.

134
00:06:12,552 --> 00:06:13,516
As an accountant...

135
00:06:13,517 --> 00:06:15,896
I mean, it's more, but you get
2.

136
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:18,275
That's 2 meals before
I have to do the dishes.

137
00:06:18,379 --> 00:06:20,172
Well why not 2 of the cheap
ones?

138
00:06:20,275 --> 00:06:21,517
Well...

139
00:06:21,620 --> 00:06:24,758
These ones have solid
acacia wood handles.

140
00:06:24,759 --> 00:06:26,619
Is that good?

141
00:06:26,620 --> 00:06:28,137
Sounds good.

142
00:06:28,138 --> 00:06:30,688
[thud] Well, it sounds like you
already know what you want.

143
00:06:30,689 --> 00:06:33,586
Hey, I'm cheap,
but I'm easily swayed.

144
00:06:33,689 --> 00:06:37,179
And these could end as your
spatulas too, if you play your cards right.

145
00:06:37,448 --> 00:06:39,172
Well, I love the wood ones.

146
00:06:39,517 --> 00:06:41,551
Really? Me too.

147
00:06:41,655 --> 00:06:43,241
Good choice.

148
00:06:43,655 --> 00:06:45,758
- [groan]
- [groan]

149
00:06:45,862 --> 00:06:47,344
How is this display bed

150
00:06:47,448 --> 00:06:49,275
so much nicer than mine?

151
00:06:50,172 --> 00:06:52,862
Well, next payday,
I'm getting a new bed.

152
00:06:53,517 --> 00:06:55,310
Or a deposit on one.

153
00:06:56,689 --> 00:06:58,655
Are you a spooner?

154
00:06:58,758 --> 00:07:00,724
- Do you need me to be?
- No.

155
00:07:00,827 --> 00:07:02,517
I never turn my back on anybody.

156
00:07:02,620 --> 00:07:05,413
- That's how they get you.
- Good.

157
00:07:06,344 --> 00:07:08,874
I'm more of a turn and meet
in the middle kind of guy.

158
00:07:10,482 --> 00:07:12,000
[laughs]

159
00:07:12,689 --> 00:07:15,689
Ahh, this is nice, right?

160
00:07:16,827 --> 00:07:17,965
[sighs]

161
00:07:18,068 --> 00:07:20,379
Do real people actually spoon?

162
00:07:20,931 --> 00:07:23,965
- I'm sure some people do,
somewhere. -[chuckles]

163
00:07:24,448 --> 00:07:27,517
We've been swapping left
and right these past few weeks.

164
00:07:27,620 --> 00:07:29,689
What side do you naturally sleep
on?

165
00:07:30,103 --> 00:07:32,586
- Traditionally I fall on the
left. -Uh oh.

166
00:07:32,689 --> 00:07:34,586
- [chuckles]
- Me too.

167
00:07:34,689 --> 00:07:36,517
Well, flip you for it?

168
00:07:36,620 --> 00:07:38,758
- Do you have a coin?
- I have an app.

169
00:07:40,344 --> 00:07:41,494
- Installed?
- Mmm hmm.

170
00:07:41,495 --> 00:07:42,550
How often do you use that?

171
00:07:42,551 --> 00:07:45,413
Oh, you'd be surprised
how often I use it.

172
00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:47,068
Okay.

173
00:07:47,655 --> 00:07:49,586
- Heads or tails?
- Tails.

174
00:07:49,689 --> 00:07:51,206
Interesting.

175
00:07:52,137 --> 00:07:54,517
Ahh... oh.

176
00:07:55,448 --> 00:07:56,827
My phone died.

177
00:07:56,931 --> 00:07:58,551
Didn't you charge it on the way?

178
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,137
Hey, this is my workhorse.

179
00:08:01,241 --> 00:08:04,034
Texts, emails, notes, research.

180
00:08:04,137 --> 00:08:06,448
My entire life is on this
thing...

181
00:08:06,551 --> 00:08:08,361
and I forgot to charge it last
night.

182
00:08:08,413 --> 00:08:09,620
[laughs]

183
00:08:09,724 --> 00:08:11,551
How often do you charge yours?

184
00:08:11,552 --> 00:08:12,895
Like, once every couple of days.

185
00:08:12,896 --> 00:08:13,946
Wow.

186
00:08:13,965 --> 00:08:15,482
What a life you live.

187
00:08:15,483 --> 00:08:16,481
It's okay.

188
00:08:16,482 --> 00:08:17,532
I have a charger.

189
00:08:17,620 --> 00:08:20,448
[quiet piano music plays in
store]

190
00:08:25,606 --> 00:08:27,654
Dead?

191
00:08:27,655 --> 00:08:30,137
- I forgot to charge the charger.
- [laughs]

192
00:08:30,965 --> 00:08:32,551
Okay, let's keep it moving.

193
00:08:32,655 --> 00:08:34,034
[piano music gets louder]

194
00:08:34,137 --> 00:08:37,586
- Still no reception. -Oh. This
is like a horror movie.

195
00:08:37,689 --> 00:08:40,344
Big maze. No phone signal.

196
00:08:40,345 --> 00:08:42,930
You should have listened to the
old man at the gas station.

197
00:08:42,931 --> 00:08:46,482
Mmm, he did say a lot of people
go missing around these parts.

198
00:08:46,586 --> 00:08:48,068
Pull yourself together.

199
00:08:48,069 --> 00:08:51,309
Focus. We've got to get to
higher ground to see if we can get a signal.

200
00:08:51,310 --> 00:08:53,000
Come on.

201
00:09:17,758 --> 00:09:19,931
- Rrrahh!
- Oh... God!

202
00:09:20,034 --> 00:09:22,172
- [laughs]
- [playful hit] You idiot!

203
00:09:22,275 --> 00:09:24,103
But I'm your idiot. [kiss]

204
00:09:24,206 --> 00:09:25,655
[music softens]

205
00:09:25,758 --> 00:09:28,758
I like this, but I don't
see the bin in this colour.

206
00:09:28,759 --> 00:09:31,378
Why don't you just get a
different coloured bin?

207
00:09:31,379 --> 00:09:33,723
Have you been paying
any attention to my cart?

208
00:09:33,724 --> 00:09:36,137
I've got a colour scheme
going on here.

209
00:09:36,241 --> 00:09:38,310
[music stops]
Change of plans.

210
00:09:38,413 --> 00:09:39,689
What about black?

211
00:09:39,793 --> 00:09:43,043
Do you see your toothbrush
parked in a black toothbrush holder?

212
00:09:43,241 --> 00:09:45,034
The black is a bit too intense.

213
00:09:45,137 --> 00:09:46,413
What about the aqua one?

214
00:09:47,103 --> 00:09:48,241
It's turquoise.

215
00:09:48,344 --> 00:09:51,827
But yeah, I like it. Good
choice.

216
00:09:51,828 --> 00:09:53,654
But now we have to redo
the whole thing.

217
00:09:53,655 --> 00:09:54,792
Do you even need a
bin in the bathroom? -

218
00:09:54,793 --> 00:09:57,206
Do you know anything about
women?

219
00:09:57,310 --> 00:09:59,720
You're really throwing up
red flags here, dude.

220
00:09:59,793 --> 00:10:01,655
[chuckles]

221
00:10:01,965 --> 00:10:04,195
'Red flags to look for when
dating a new man.'

222
00:10:04,241 --> 00:10:05,620
Hmm, this should be good.

223
00:10:05,724 --> 00:10:08,206
'He's over 30 and still
lives with his parents.'

224
00:10:08,310 --> 00:10:10,379
Technicality - grandparents.

225
00:10:10,380 --> 00:10:11,447
Or is that worse?

226
00:10:11,448 --> 00:10:12,498
I don't think so.

227
00:10:12,499 --> 00:10:14,274
I think you've got
a pretty sweet setup going on.

228
00:10:14,275 --> 00:10:16,385
It's kind of separate
from the main house.

229
00:10:16,448 --> 00:10:18,103
I give you a pass on this one.

230
00:10:18,206 --> 00:10:20,310
- Well, thank you.
- Hmm.

231
00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:23,827
When was this quiz written,
1980?

232
00:10:23,931 --> 00:10:26,221
I can barely afford
the rent on this new place.

233
00:10:26,222 --> 00:10:29,171
If that's a red flag, then we
are all fucked in this economy.

234
00:10:29,172 --> 00:10:30,379
[chuckles]

235
00:10:30,620 --> 00:10:32,620
'He seems a little too perfect.'

236
00:10:32,827 --> 00:10:34,310
We'll see.

237
00:10:34,413 --> 00:10:36,379
[quiet upbeat music plays in
store]

238
00:10:36,482 --> 00:10:38,758
'He promotes an alpha attitude.'

239
00:10:39,448 --> 00:10:40,689
[negative sound]

240
00:10:40,690 --> 00:10:42,723
'He spends more time
with his friends.' [scoffs]

241
00:10:42,724 --> 00:10:45,194
Oh God, they're really digging
in the boot, huh?

242
00:10:45,206 --> 00:10:46,793
Pass.

243
00:10:47,889 --> 00:10:50,895
Uhh, are you allowed to do that?

244
00:10:50,896 --> 00:10:51,964
Well, it's not stealing.

245
00:10:51,965 --> 00:10:54,517
It's going to be mine in 20
minutes.

246
00:10:56,586 --> 00:10:58,689
'He is not emotionally open.'

247
00:10:58,690 --> 00:11:00,826
See, I don't really get that.
What does that even mean?

248
00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:04,206
Oh, I think it just means you're
forthcoming and honest

249
00:11:04,310 --> 00:11:05,758
about your feelings.

250
00:11:05,759 --> 00:11:08,240
I mean, I feel like I've been
pretty honest with you so far, haven't I?

251
00:11:08,241 --> 00:11:11,344
Yeah, you have. As far as I
know.

252
00:11:11,345 --> 00:11:14,412
Did you want me to tell you
every single thing that I'm feeling?

253
00:11:14,413 --> 00:11:15,895
'Cause I've done the open
book thing before,

254
00:11:15,896 --> 00:11:18,726
- and it's never really worked
out. -That's interesting.

255
00:11:18,827 --> 00:11:20,379
Unpack that for me.

256
00:11:20,380 --> 00:11:23,654
I mean, I do this thing where I
understand people pretty quickly.

257
00:11:23,655 --> 00:11:26,655
And when I express my
observations

258
00:11:26,931 --> 00:11:29,310
in an open-hearted way,
they tend to get mad.

259
00:11:29,931 --> 00:11:31,172
It doesn't really sound

260
00:11:31,173 --> 00:11:33,826
like you're being emotionally
honest about yourself, though.

261
00:11:33,827 --> 00:11:35,550
It sort of just sounds like
you're

262
00:11:35,551 --> 00:11:40,000
talking at people, which sort of
sounds a bit rude. [chuckles]

263
00:11:40,827 --> 00:11:43,172
- Noted.
- [chuckles]

264
00:11:45,724 --> 00:11:48,896
'He is over 30 and never had
a long term relationship.'

265
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,137
Ohh.

266
00:11:50,138 --> 00:11:51,136
Go!

267
00:11:51,137 --> 00:11:52,930
What was your longest
relationship?

268
00:11:52,931 --> 00:11:53,792
5 years.

269
00:11:53,793 --> 00:11:55,000
Wait, what?

270
00:11:55,103 --> 00:11:56,172
When?

271
00:11:56,275 --> 00:11:57,965
25 to 30.

272
00:11:58,448 --> 00:12:00,379
What happened?

273
00:12:00,380 --> 00:12:02,067
It kind of just played itself
out.

274
00:12:02,068 --> 00:12:05,000
Oh, come on, you have to give
me more than that.

275
00:12:05,862 --> 00:12:07,448
What was she like?

276
00:12:07,551 --> 00:12:09,137
What was her name?

277
00:12:09,138 --> 00:12:11,895
Did you ever get engaged
at any point? [laughs] Come on.

278
00:12:11,896 --> 00:12:13,517
You have to give me something.

279
00:12:13,620 --> 00:12:15,000
- Her name was Sam.
- Mmm?

280
00:12:15,103 --> 00:12:18,000
And she was great.
It wasn't her fault.

281
00:12:18,103 --> 00:12:20,137
And no, we were never engaged.

282
00:12:20,241 --> 00:12:21,965
How? Sorry.

283
00:12:22,068 --> 00:12:24,137
This is none of my business.

284
00:12:24,241 --> 00:12:26,586
No. It's fine.
I just never really asked.

285
00:12:27,551 --> 00:12:30,310
It shouldn't have gone on
for as long as it did.

286
00:12:31,137 --> 00:12:32,655
I... I knew it wasn't

287
00:12:32,758 --> 00:12:35,468
really going to last, and it
wasn't really fair on her.

288
00:12:35,724 --> 00:12:36,931
How'd you know?

289
00:12:37,586 --> 00:12:39,206
I mean, you just know, right?

290
00:12:40,586 --> 00:12:42,068
- Yep.
- [chuckles]

291
00:12:43,172 --> 00:12:45,827
Okay. [clap]
So. Longest relationship.

292
00:12:45,931 --> 00:12:46,981
No.

293
00:12:47,103 --> 00:12:49,931
'Scuse me, this is a
'red flags for dudes' quiz.

294
00:12:50,034 --> 00:12:51,084
Fair's fair.

295
00:12:53,758 --> 00:12:55,344
Okay, fine.

296
00:12:55,448 --> 00:12:57,965
2 years with David.

297
00:12:58,068 --> 00:13:02,068
But by circumstance, we got a
little locked in by the old pandemic.

298
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:04,380
And what about before that?

299
00:13:04,965 --> 00:13:06,015
Hmm...

300
00:13:06,448 --> 00:13:08,413
I guess just a couple of months.

301
00:13:08,517 --> 00:13:09,567
Really?

302
00:13:09,568 --> 00:13:10,619
A couple of months.

303
00:13:10,620 --> 00:13:11,827
Is that it?

304
00:13:12,965 --> 00:13:15,241
Wait, am I the red flag here?

305
00:13:16,655 --> 00:13:17,896
[laughs]

306
00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:20,413
[cheerful music plays]

307
00:13:20,414 --> 00:13:26,861
'He avoids talk of commitment
and remains elusive about the future.'

308
00:13:26,862 --> 00:13:29,413
Well, I did ask you to
marry me, didn't I?

309
00:13:29,517 --> 00:13:31,931
But that has been a
problem in the past.

310
00:13:32,896 --> 00:13:36,206
David asked me to marry
him after a year.

311
00:13:36,310 --> 00:13:37,620
- Really?
- Mmm hmm.

312
00:13:37,724 --> 00:13:39,793
- And what was your answer?
- Nothing.

313
00:13:39,794 --> 00:13:42,619
I just ran to the bathroom and
he never brought it up again.

314
00:13:42,620 --> 00:13:44,793
[laughs]
'He has a history of cheating.'

315
00:13:44,896 --> 00:13:47,275
- Never.
- Never?

316
00:13:47,379 --> 00:13:50,620
Hmm. Pass, obviously.

317
00:13:50,724 --> 00:13:52,896
- [laughs]
- But never before.

318
00:13:53,310 --> 00:13:55,310
Have you ever been cheated on?

319
00:13:55,413 --> 00:13:57,551
Nope. Or, I don't think so.

320
00:13:57,655 --> 00:13:58,758
Not that I know of.

321
00:13:58,862 --> 00:13:59,965
I have.

322
00:14:00,068 --> 00:14:01,482
Well, I'm not gonna do that.

323
00:14:01,586 --> 00:14:03,620
Yeah, that's what they all say.

324
00:14:03,724 --> 00:14:06,482
Yeah, but I'm not them. I'm me.

325
00:14:06,483 --> 00:14:09,274
You know, I didn't even have a
proper boyfriend until after high school.

326
00:14:09,275 --> 00:14:10,378
I find that hard to believe.

327
00:14:10,379 --> 00:14:11,931
Well, believe it.

328
00:14:12,034 --> 00:14:14,241
And when I did, I got the big
fish.

329
00:14:14,344 --> 00:14:16,103
The most popular guy at school.

330
00:14:16,104 --> 00:14:17,481
Captain of the football team?

331
00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:19,172
[laughs] No.

332
00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:22,705
The thing about my school was
that the douchebags were the cool kids.

333
00:14:23,586 --> 00:14:25,413
Ugh, it was so dumb.

334
00:14:25,517 --> 00:14:26,689
I was just so over

335
00:14:26,793 --> 00:14:29,743
the moon that he had picked me,
that somebody had picked me.

336
00:14:30,517 --> 00:14:32,344
I'd been a real nobody at
school.

337
00:14:32,448 --> 00:14:33,758
- Come on.
- No, it's true.

338
00:14:33,862 --> 00:14:35,586
Anyone will tell you.

339
00:14:35,689 --> 00:14:38,137
And they'll tell you how lucky I
was.

340
00:14:38,241 --> 00:14:40,206
And I believed it.

341
00:14:40,310 --> 00:14:43,344
I was somebody for,
like, 3 months,

342
00:14:43,827 --> 00:14:46,241
and he was cheating on me
the entire time.

343
00:14:46,344 --> 00:14:47,931
And everyone knew.

344
00:14:48,034 --> 00:14:51,404
And they still said I was lucky
because I was the public girlfriend.

345
00:14:51,448 --> 00:14:53,344
How fucked up is that?

346
00:14:53,448 --> 00:14:55,586
- It's up there.
- Hmm.

347
00:14:55,689 --> 00:14:57,689
And it was with my sister.

348
00:14:57,793 --> 00:14:59,620
- What?
- Mmm hmm.

349
00:14:59,724 --> 00:15:01,103
Yeah, I come from a town

350
00:15:01,206 --> 00:15:04,206
where everyone fucks everyone
and nobody gets out alive.

351
00:15:04,207 --> 00:15:05,930
Except you.

352
00:15:05,931 --> 00:15:07,827
Did I, though?

353
00:15:09,438 --> 00:15:11,550
You still talk to her?

354
00:15:11,551 --> 00:15:13,103
Not if I can avoid it.

355
00:15:13,206 --> 00:15:14,346
A couple of times a year.

356
00:15:14,379 --> 00:15:17,448
5 minutes on birthdays and
things.

357
00:15:17,551 --> 00:15:20,137
- They have a kid now.
- They?

358
00:15:20,241 --> 00:15:23,620
Yeah, they're still together.
They're married. [laughs]

359
00:15:23,724 --> 00:15:25,862
- Holy shit.
- [laughs] Yeah.

360
00:15:25,965 --> 00:15:28,068
Ah, it's fine though.

361
00:15:28,310 --> 00:15:30,275
They were built for that place.

362
00:15:30,379 --> 00:15:33,931
I dodged a bullet,
and they seem happy, I think.

363
00:15:34,034 --> 00:15:35,551
- But still.
- Yeah.

364
00:15:35,655 --> 00:15:37,379
But still.

365
00:15:39,448 --> 00:15:40,793
All right.

366
00:15:40,794 --> 00:15:43,895
'He's a serial dater with little
or no gaps between relationships.'

367
00:15:43,896 --> 00:15:44,861
Okay, you know what?

368
00:15:44,862 --> 00:15:46,862
This quiz is fucking stupid.

369
00:15:46,965 --> 00:15:51,275
If everyone used this as a
yardstick to decide and define

370
00:15:51,379 --> 00:15:55,827
their relationships, it's no
wonder everyone is alone and miserable.

371
00:15:56,379 --> 00:15:57,931
I mean, who can pass this shit?

372
00:15:58,034 --> 00:16:00,344
We failed half of this stupid
quiz.

373
00:16:00,448 --> 00:16:02,068
And yet, here we are.

374
00:16:03,034 --> 00:16:04,620
Here we are.

375
00:16:04,724 --> 00:16:07,137
[calm piano music starts]

376
00:16:07,241 --> 00:16:08,310
Ahh, fuck 'em.

377
00:16:12,896 --> 00:16:14,931
28... 29.

378
00:16:21,344 --> 00:16:23,310
- This one.
- 35.

379
00:16:23,413 --> 00:16:25,896
- 'Gr�nsta!'
- Oh!

380
00:16:27,896 --> 00:16:29,517
Dang, that's heavy.

381
00:16:30,241 --> 00:16:31,689
[hit]

382
00:16:32,310 --> 00:16:35,241
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

383
00:16:41,206 --> 00:16:43,000
[Ryan] Woo!

384
00:16:44,931 --> 00:16:46,862
So this is my shout.

385
00:16:48,620 --> 00:16:51,241
- This is the best date ever.
- [chuckles]

386
00:16:51,242 --> 00:16:55,550
So I've been making my way
through your reviews and articles.

387
00:16:55,551 --> 00:16:58,206
- Uh oh.
- Very funny.

388
00:16:58,310 --> 00:16:59,620
Thank you.

389
00:16:59,724 --> 00:17:02,974
No, I knew you were, like, funny
in real life and everything, but

390
00:17:03,068 --> 00:17:05,206
you're a great writer too.

391
00:17:05,310 --> 00:17:07,344
That's very nice of you.

392
00:17:07,448 --> 00:17:08,931
And I read your short story.

393
00:17:09,034 --> 00:17:10,206
Wait, what?

394
00:17:10,310 --> 00:17:12,551
My short story? How did you?

395
00:17:12,827 --> 00:17:14,689
Have you been cyberstalking me?

396
00:17:14,793 --> 00:17:15,965
Yeah, you inspired me.

397
00:17:15,966 --> 00:17:18,033
Did you not trawl
through my social media

398
00:17:18,034 --> 00:17:19,757
and find out
everything you could about me?

399
00:17:19,758 --> 00:17:21,482
Fair enough.

400
00:17:21,483 --> 00:17:23,516
I didn't know you were an
award winning author.

401
00:17:23,517 --> 00:17:25,620
[groans] Second place.

402
00:17:25,724 --> 00:17:28,379
- Did you get a trophy?
- I got a certificate.

403
00:17:28,482 --> 00:17:30,551
- That's an award.
- [laughs]

404
00:17:30,655 --> 00:17:32,344
[thud] Hi.

405
00:17:32,345 --> 00:17:35,033
The whole contest folded
a year later.

406
00:17:35,034 --> 00:17:36,826
I think the bar was
getting pretty low.

407
00:17:36,827 --> 00:17:39,275
[Contactless payment sound]
Okay?

408
00:17:39,379 --> 00:17:41,586
- Thank you.
- Thanks.

409
00:17:42,413 --> 00:17:44,103
I loved it.

410
00:17:44,104 --> 00:17:46,895
'And the air was filled with
coconut smoke and the dense

411
00:17:46,896 --> 00:17:49,172
tang of a hundred
clashing fragrances.'

412
00:17:49,173 --> 00:17:50,171
Oh.

413
00:17:50,172 --> 00:17:51,586
That's my favorite line.

414
00:17:51,689 --> 00:17:53,310
Thank you. [laughs]

415
00:17:53,413 --> 00:17:56,379
You get paid to do what you do,
which would stand to reason

416
00:17:56,482 --> 00:17:58,413
that you're good at it. Right?

417
00:17:58,414 --> 00:18:00,378
You're really good at it.

418
00:18:00,379 --> 00:18:02,275
Okay... Is this going to be

419
00:18:02,276 --> 00:18:05,447
one of those 'you're too good
for what you're doing' things?

420
00:18:05,448 --> 00:18:06,827
No.

421
00:18:06,931 --> 00:18:10,181
I'm just letting you know that I
think you're great at what you do.

422
00:18:10,482 --> 00:18:13,482
Thank you.
[both laugh]

423
00:18:14,862 --> 00:18:16,482
[hit]

424
00:18:16,896 --> 00:18:18,689
[chairs scrape]

425
00:18:19,034 --> 00:18:22,655
So, are you good at accounting?

426
00:18:22,656 --> 00:18:25,654
Yep. But I'm not gonna make you
read a bunch of spreadsheets.

427
00:18:25,655 --> 00:18:27,655
[both chuckle]

428
00:18:28,551 --> 00:18:30,517
What you do is quantifiable.

429
00:18:31,482 --> 00:18:34,103
Entertaining talent.
People like that.

430
00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:37,448
[baby gurgles]

431
00:18:38,689 --> 00:18:40,000
[kiss]

432
00:18:42,379 --> 00:18:44,103
I almost had one of those.

433
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,310
[Ryan] Had one what?

434
00:18:46,413 --> 00:18:48,413
A kid.

435
00:18:48,793 --> 00:18:49,862
Really?

436
00:18:49,965 --> 00:18:52,206
Right at the start of lockdown.

437
00:18:52,517 --> 00:18:53,896
- Oh.
- Yeah.

438
00:18:53,897 --> 00:18:55,723
I was probably pregnant
last time I saw you,

439
00:18:55,724 --> 00:18:57,516
and I didn't even know it yet.
[small laugh]

440
00:18:57,517 --> 00:18:59,827
- Oh, wow.
- Yeah.

441
00:18:59,931 --> 00:19:03,862
Good thing that you didn't
hit on me then, huh?

442
00:19:05,689 --> 00:19:07,068
What happened?

443
00:19:07,172 --> 00:19:10,344
Err, it didn't take.

444
00:19:10,448 --> 00:19:12,551
I miscarried after 15 weeks.

445
00:19:12,655 --> 00:19:14,758
I've got a septate uterus.

446
00:19:14,862 --> 00:19:17,896
- A what?
- Ah, my uterus is like a nose.

447
00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:20,517
It has a septum running
through the middle.

448
00:19:21,103 --> 00:19:23,137
Wow. Never heard of that before.

449
00:19:23,241 --> 00:19:25,482
Yeah, neither had I.

450
00:19:25,483 --> 00:19:28,343
But I'm hopefully gonna get it
fixed

451
00:19:28,344 --> 00:19:31,033
now that elective surgeries are
back on. So don't worry.

452
00:19:31,034 --> 00:19:34,827
You're not going to be saddled
with some vaginal freak show or something.

453
00:19:34,931 --> 00:19:36,758
[small laugh]

454
00:19:39,896 --> 00:19:41,068
I did ask the doctor

455
00:19:41,172 --> 00:19:44,586
if I could ever have kids,
and he said, 'we'll see'.

456
00:19:45,172 --> 00:19:48,758
So that's a very cool
thing to carry around at 35.

457
00:19:50,241 --> 00:19:51,291
I'm sorry.

458
00:19:51,292 --> 00:19:52,930
- Mmm.
- That that happened to you.

459
00:19:52,931 --> 00:19:54,379
It is what it is.

460
00:19:54,482 --> 00:19:57,034
That's what they say, right?
[laughs]

461
00:19:58,413 --> 00:20:00,000
Something like that.

462
00:20:05,793 --> 00:20:07,896
Can I be honest?

463
00:20:08,551 --> 00:20:11,793
This is such a horrible
thing to say. But...

464
00:20:11,896 --> 00:20:14,137
I was actually kind of relieved.

465
00:20:14,724 --> 00:20:15,804
How did David take it?

466
00:20:15,862 --> 00:20:19,551
Very cavalier, very pragmatic.

467
00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:22,206
I mean, he is a doctor, after
all.

468
00:20:22,310 --> 00:20:24,379
He was like, 'it's okay.'

469
00:20:24,482 --> 00:20:27,517
'Just wasn't meant to be.'

470
00:20:27,620 --> 00:20:33,275
And I was like, this whole
fucking thing isn't meant to be.

471
00:20:33,689 --> 00:20:35,724
And I knew there and then.

472
00:20:35,827 --> 00:20:37,689
I think he did, too.

473
00:20:37,793 --> 00:20:40,000
But we stayed in it anyway.

474
00:20:41,413 --> 00:20:44,448
I've always been really scared
of being alone.

475
00:20:44,449 --> 00:20:46,930
And then the pandemic hit,
and suddenly

476
00:20:46,931 --> 00:20:49,931
everyone is isolated.

477
00:20:50,620 --> 00:20:52,275
I mean, I didn't even see

478
00:20:52,379 --> 00:20:56,103
anyone really, other than
David for like 2 years.

479
00:20:57,551 --> 00:20:59,482
And so I was scared of leaving
him

480
00:20:59,586 --> 00:21:02,310
because I didn't
want to be truly alone.

481
00:21:02,413 --> 00:21:05,413
But I was still lonely

482
00:21:05,793 --> 00:21:08,034
even when I was with him.

483
00:21:10,965 --> 00:21:12,620
After we lost the baby,

484
00:21:12,724 --> 00:21:15,586
I don't think either of us
wanted to lose anything else.

485
00:21:15,689 --> 00:21:18,103
[sad piano music plays]

486
00:21:18,896 --> 00:21:22,379
I don't think human beings are
meant to be stuck at home alone.

487
00:21:22,482 --> 00:21:24,532
I think we're meant to be
out in the world...

488
00:21:24,620 --> 00:21:26,655
Living...

489
00:21:26,758 --> 00:21:29,068
Eating meatballs at IKEA.

490
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:37,586
The kid would be, like,
over a year now.

491
00:21:38,413 --> 00:21:41,137
I mean, can you imagine
me with a kid?

492
00:21:41,241 --> 00:21:45,000
I can barely take care of
myself. [laughs]

493
00:21:45,275 --> 00:21:47,310
Hey.

494
00:21:47,413 --> 00:21:49,000
Come here.

495
00:22:00,344 --> 00:22:02,931
Well yeah, there's the story.

496
00:22:03,034 --> 00:22:06,206
There's your out, if any of that
is a deal breaker for you.

497
00:22:07,379 --> 00:22:09,344
It's not a deal breaker for me.

498
00:22:10,793 --> 00:22:12,068
Even after all that?

499
00:22:12,172 --> 00:22:15,000
Especially after all that.

500
00:22:15,103 --> 00:22:18,034
As far as skeletons go,
you're doing fine.

501
00:22:28,310 --> 00:22:29,724
[phone beeps]

502
00:22:29,827 --> 00:22:31,379
[text alert]

503
00:22:32,379 --> 00:22:34,551
Sorry.
[music stops]

504
00:22:34,655 --> 00:22:36,172
[both chuckle]

505
00:22:37,172 --> 00:22:40,310
- [phone unlocks]
- What's up?

506
00:22:42,241 --> 00:22:45,137
Antonio quit as CEO

507
00:22:45,241 --> 00:22:49,862
and his company just shut down
the entire online publishing section.

508
00:22:55,896 --> 00:22:58,413
I think I just lost my job.

509
00:23:06,724 --> 00:23:09,793
[sombre end credits music]

510
00:23:09,843 --> 00:23:14,393
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0